That's Why They Won't Hear Your Scream
by Rubinia
Summary: Kind of hex joke strikes unwary Hogward students in a chamber where even king goes on his feet. Is it another mischief of Fred and George or perhaps something bigger and grimer? Do good intentions count where monsters are taken into account? Are the monsters out-of-place in Hogward - among Fluffy, Basilisc, Aragog and Dementors? Will they come at night - or lay down all story long?


Something peculiar happend to boys toilet on Seventh Floor in School of Magic and Wizardy Hogwart. It was one of foggy and bleak November Mondays when Harry Potter headed there led by prosaic, nature-inducted reason. The thing most irritating not only for him, but for number of Hogward male students as well, is that walls of entire long corridor at the end of which the bathroom is located are decorated with paintings of fountains and waterfalls. Just a few pieces of art present different subjects, like a group of elderly witches pouring tea to Chinese porcelein pots or a crazy white-bearded wizard busing himself with washing dishes under stream of beer from big oak barrel, or group of pupils watering Tentacula plants, or famous mage musician Harpheus Arokhaus playing on water organs, and the notable last one is a landscape of Great Lake stirring from Trytons in-water games and races.

In rush, Harry pushed the triangle-marked door and go straigh to a cabin. It took there a while. The moment he stopped by to wash his hands, Harry gave an indifferent look at the mirror and in guts-gnitting shock he noticed he had looked different. In rising horror, he rose a hand to his mouth and under fingertips made it horribly sure he had had no such bodily part. Where there should be lips, mouth, teeth, there was but a tender and unpenetranable soft skin.

With throathly, hardly hearable moan he bent in half and run off the bathroom in wild need of reaching the infirmery.

* * *

"My, my, such a childish hex. Who has put in on you, deary? Well, don't talk, I'll put you right into order in a moment." said Mrs Poppins.

She treated place where Harry's mouth should be with yellowish ointment and used some Transfiguration magic. Judging from sharp burrowing her brews and a bit impatient wave of wand, the process was more sluggish than she expected. After a quarter of magic-medical remedies Harry had his face back. He could even laugh at the event.

Mrs Poppins smiled in motherly way and gave him a cup of hot chocolate. Then she came to the backroom to send a message to Dumbledore. Some nasty, potent magic revealed itself within Hogward walls.

The stupitidy of the joke didn't make the case neglectable.

* * *

Harry talked about this silly adventure with his friends when he came back to Griffindor Hall. He laughed full of relieve, but all the same he prompted Ron to remember there is now new reason to avoid the infamous bathroom. Hermione expression was deadly serious, though.

"It must have been potent hex if Mrs Poppins took time to repell it." she said with a bit un-present look in her eyes, as when she searched through all books she had read in life in pursue of some facts and figures. "Normally but an ointment or a spell is enought, but to use both and still have trouble..."

"Don't worry, Hermione. Maybe the ointment was old, Mrs Poppins said it was quite a time since last such accident happened." Harry reassured. "The good thing is I can talk and eat back."

"I'd wager Fred and George are behind it." Ron said. "It's their kind of thing."

But Fred and George denied, though were visibly dissapoionted they hadn't come accros the idea earlier, and only argued on ways to implement it in the only obviously better way.

"Since it was toilet, it shouldn't be mouth to be obstructed!" said George and for the rest of the evening they tried to figure out how to magically do it. Hermione listened to it in low spirits, burried deep in thoughts. Ron and Harry played a magical chess. Neville was writting a long and nasty homework of usage of various creatures' eggs in potion making for Snape.

* * *

The next day during the breakfast in Great Hall it was announced that boys bathroom on Seventh Floor is closed and going there is now forbidden. The reason is that the moment one steps the treshold, his mouth dissappear replaced with soft skin, and jumping over the doorstep doesn't help. It was also emphasised that if a pupil is found with mouth lacking, his house will be severly punished in terms of points.

"Oh, if I only knew the No Mouth Charm! I must write to my uncle Ben, then imagine all these stunned Slithers!" sighted Dean Thomas. Harry leaned,intrigued.

"Could you teach me then, too?" he asked.

"That would be cheating on!" hissed Hermione.

"No if I won't use it." Harry grinned. "In fact it would be lend of hand for Dudley, he already eats too much... Just joking." he passed under strict look of Hermione full of disaproval.

* * *

The next lesson was in dungeons. With resigned sight they packed their kettles and books, then headed down to grim, obscure domain of Severus Snape.

"Today you'll have no use of your brass kettles. Don't bother with them. In that cupboard you will find golden kettles. Take one for four person."

Harry, Ron and Hermione formed a group with Neville, who smiled shyly. Every potions lesson was a nightmare for Neville, and this one seemed to be particularly difficult. They never before used golden kettles, suitable for the most corrosive or potent elixires.

Snape waited as everybody returned to their desks and looked around slowly, when silently moving through class chamber like giant bat or a relatively short Dementor. Indeed, some kind of chill seemed to accompany him.

"In the pot on my desk" said Snape, waving one pale hand to point direction. "You find a small amount of deadly substance. I advice each and every fool here in walls of my class to not even think of violation rules of conduct, which are: aproach the desk one by one, wear gloves from dragon skin, let me hand you a vial full of the substance, return to your station and put the vial to golden knettle, then pour it with a mixture of bull's blood and fairy dust in proportion of ten to one, which will dissolve the vial. I want no casualties today. If someone causes trouble I promise he will regret he wasn't a casualty. Any questiones?"

Hermione raised a hand.

"Any other questiones?", Snape insisted. Noone moved.

"Granger, you don't need to know." said Snape then. Hermione had a bit surprised, but mostly offended look. "Potter, you go first."

Harry obeyed unwilingly. Something in stern look of Snape's black eyes made him fully realise that the teacher is teoretically capable of drowning him in said deadly knettle. He felt that gaze on his back all way back to the table. Hermione had the vial-dissolving mixture ready. A noticeable amount of white smoke rised from the golden knettle. The vile subtance was, judging by the look, nothing anybody would be willing to touch. Yellowish-white, thicker than blood, created a lazily growing and dissolving bubbles.

"Can you hear that?" asked Harry, striken by the quiet hiss that was comming from the substance. Others gave him doubtfull looks.

"Silence!" snapped Snape from his place near the desk. "Patil, return to your seat." Then he took the last vial and brought it to Parvatis' place.

"Pour an ounce of acromantula venom to the kettle and observe results." Snape instructed.

Giant spider's venom boiled violently and clarified. The contents of kettles divided into two easly distinguishable layers, as dregs in cool tea. Under teacher's guidance they took a spoonfull of transparent liquid.

"Clear water".


End file.
